So You’re Maid of Honor: 02 The Bachelorette

Here we are, round two of celebrating your newly assumed part-time role (or full-time, depending on your bride) as maid of honor. Did you miss part one? Check it out.

Now that you’ve made it through the bridal shower, take a second to pat yourself on the back. Whether you threw a summer BBQ in the bride’s backyard or brought everyone to an island (like Nantucket – which I have yet to see), you made it! You did a great job and you’re 1/3 of the way through your maid of honor duties.

Maid of Honor Duties

Like the first part, when you hosted that kick-ass bridal shower, we’ll break this down by before, during, and after the bride’s bachelorette.

Maid of Honor Duties: 02 Bachelorette Party


Before the Bachelorette:

Again, like planning a bridal shower, the bulk of your work is happening before, during….well….the planning stages. Here we go.

  • Check in with the bride and manage expectations. Is she hoping for an evening downtown or a weekend away on a secluded island with her best gals? It’s best to know as far ahead of time as possible. The price point will help not only the bridal party decide if they can attend, but also all of the other invited guests. If you’re on the search for a unique bachelorette party – The Knot has some fun ideas – like glamping.
  • Next, you’ll want to check in with any vendors you might need and/or the venue where you’ll be going. If you’re going away for a weekend, reserve the hotel, arrange transportation, find some fun activities/sites to see, etc. 
  • Make sure the bridesmaids are all on the same page here. They should know all the details before the rest of the guests do. Incorporate them into the planning as much as possible! It’s never nice to feel left out.
  • Now, once you know what the bride wants, it’s time to help her make the invite list. Remind her, again, only those invited to the wedding should be invited to the bachelorette.
  • Send those babies out! Again, I’m going to suggest Paperless Post here. You can order and send the cards digitally or order printed cards! Super easy and affordable for every budget.
    • Pro tip: You don’t have to stick to the cards that are in the “Bachelorette Party” section. Instead, search for the colors or themes you like and go from there! All you have to do is switch out the text…which you would be doing anyway. Voilà!
    • Above are two of my favorites – a summer pool party and a pineapple theme! You just can’t go wrong.
  • Two weeks out – follow up with guests with any additional info they should know and let them know how excited you are that they’re joining! For those who haven’t RSVP’d yet, give them a hard date (and kindly request that they RSVP by then).

Maid of Honor Duties: 02 The Bachelorette

During the Bachelorette:

Here comes the fun! Especially if you’re hosting a margarita garden partylike Shop Sweet Lulu did! Now all of that hard work you’ve put in to planning the event pays off! You get to celebrate with the bride, her friends, family, and more.

  • Meet everyone! Make sure to introduce yourself to those you don’t know and make your way around the group to greet everyone. While you may have your “buddy” there, try not to be exclusive.
  • Your maid of honor duties aren’t totally over while celebrating. You’ll still want to be aware and answering logistical questions – for example, transportation, timing, locations, etc. At leas one person will have at least one questions, so be prepared!
  • Take charge with the bill if everyone’s splitting it – find the easiest way for everyone to pay. Sounds silly, but it’s best to take care of it, especially if everyone’s out drinking. If that’s the case, try to stay at least a little sober to be able to help in any situation.
  • You can still have fun, though! Don’t let this sound like you can’t.
  • Make sure the bride is enjoying herself! She probably will be, but keep an eye out for creepy dudes trying to infiltrate the festivities, etc.

After the Bachelorette:

Whew! You’ve made it and now you’re one step closer to the big day! Here’s what you can do after the bachelorette.

  • Treat yourself to a deep sigh of relief because your major planning is OVER.
  • Send out a thank you to guests if using an e-invite system. No need to send out paper invites in snail mail; they’ll be receiving thank you notes from the bride for the bridal shower, wedding gift, etc.
  • Check in with day-of details with bride, that’s your next big feat – and the last step in your maid of honor duties!
  • Enjoy yourself! You should have at least a little bit of time before the wedding to relax and prepare yourself. If the bachelorette is happening during the week of the wedding, embrace the crazy and have as much fun with your friend during her wedding week as possible!
  • Background: For the wedding that I was just in and was maid of honor for, the bachelorette happened just TWO days before the wedding. It was crazy, but we made it through and you will too!).

Are you in the midst of planning a wedding? Tell me your tips on maid of honor duties! Would love to share them here.


(images: paperless post, shop sweet lulu)

Author: gabriella

Gabriella is a blogger, Director of Social Media in Boston, and City Manager for the BOS Lady Project. You'll typically find her with an iced chai in one hand and a book in the other.

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